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REVENGE OF THE GUMMY BEARS!!! (ft. The Lions Pride)

Before I begin this post, I want to give a massive thank you to all the support I got from my previous post (  (*cries tears of gratitude*) 

I would also like to point out that the post came into my popular posts list in only two days!
Here is what my blog view graph looks like because of it:

As this clearly shows, my blog traffic was very low, but directly after I made the post, it took a big spike up.

But just because my views are getting better, doesn't mean I won't have another crisis with my views. This time, I have competition-and no, it isn't Xiang. Its my school newspaper, The Lion's Pride. I am actually one of the authors for it. They have a blog, but I won't state the address in this post just yet because--well, you will find out later. Just keep reading. In the beginning of the school year, when they first made a publication, their daily views amount was insane! Once, they got 10,000 additional views in a day! That same amount usually takes me a month or two to make! Not only that, but over 700 people (the entire school knew about it) was reading it. They once came within 2 thousand views of beating my views, but a few weeks after the publication, everyone had already read it. Traffic for the newspaper slowed down again. I was able to climb 20,000 views ahead. Yesterday, I checked and they had 36 thousand views. Earlier today they had 37,000. Now they have 38,000.

Their next publication is coming very soon-in fact, as of the time that I am writing this post, it comes out tomorrow. So I will use my secret weapon--not reloading my blog page a lot. I tried that last time, but it was pretty ineffective so I stopped. 

I wrote a story in their creative writing section. It was from the point-of-view of a gummy bear, However, my rough draft of the story was a bit too disgusting for my teacher, so she instead decided to end the story early. She didn't include the gross parts, just to make it school friendly and stuff. They have that article already. What is the point of simply copy and pasting it to here? I decided to do something... well, different. 

I have something the magazine doesn't have. I am going to put the raw, unedited version of the gummy bear story. The gummy bears will now have their revenge on The Lions Pride. (*dramatic music*)

 I think the story is pretty decent either way, but there is something you should keep in mind before reading: I made it so that the story is in a loop. The first sentence is also the last sentence. This way, there would be no question of what would happen next after the story, no sequel needed. The way I made that happen though--is a bit strange, to say the least. 

So brace yourselves, and enjoy!

The Secret Life of a Gummy Bear
By Arca Baran

My first ever real memory was of falling through a large plastic tube. Then I landed in a bucket full of neon-red liquid. I felt the ground below me moving. Next, I went into a very cold chamber, and I exited the chamber as a solid material. A large metal plate with several bear-shaped holes in it was then smashed on my face, but at least I could finally move. I looked down at my stubby little hands and feet, and noticed that I had a belly button in the middle of my transparent red body.
I looked around and saw a pile of other gummy bears next to me. They all came in bright and playful colors, from water-blue to sunshine-yellow. Just before I thought I might drown in the other gummies, I felt a sudden drop. I held onto my ears tight as I fell into a small plastic bag, and heaved a sigh of relief when I realized that I finally had room to breathe. This time, there were significantly fewer bears around me. The bag around me was shiny gold and had a clear transparent front to it. I saw several more bags in front of me.
I wondered for a moment what our purpose was. I assumed that we were children’s toys, since it seemed like we were meant for kids. I could be wrong, but that seemed like the most reasonable option.
On a part of the bag around me, I could make out the word “OBIRAH.” It looked backwards to me. What is “HARIBO” supposed to mean, anyways? It sounds like a type of instrument. Or a llama. Or a llama instrument. The bag also had a slogan on it: “WE ONLY USE THE BEST INGREDIENTS! 100% TRUSTED BY FAMILIES AROUND THE WORLD!” I wondered what those ingredients actually were. There was some yellow creature on it giving a thumbs up. It had a large nose and two small ears. I thought it was a dog. That didn’t make much sense, so maybe it was a bear. Dogs would drool instead.
I still felt motion below me, though. Wait—I was moving on some kind of black carpet. Shortly after, I was picked up by a gigantic hand and placed in a box with several other bags. I heard a noise above me, somewhere from the lid of the box. Then everything went dark. I felt the box being lifted up and dropped off.
Every part of me that I could feel was being thrown around in the bag by some vibration, and it made me very dizzy. I heard the honking of some vehicles outside. After what might have been a year, or a million years, or just a few hours, the vehicle came to an abrupt halt. I felt doors open behind me. I was being lifted again! Suddenly, I heard a ripping noise above my bag. The darkness once inside the box was pierced by the first bright light I had seen in hours.
I saw something that resembled a face. Whether it was actually a face, I shall never know. It had short black hair on the top with two eyebrows below it. I don’t know if I would be correct to call them eyebrows. They were more like hairy bushes. These bushes partially blocked out two beady eyes. There was a large bump that had two holes in it. I assumed that it could be a nose, but it was very different from mine and much larger. Surrounding the mouth was a lot of black hair. It reminded me of a garden that had too many weeds in it, except the weeds were hair.
I only had a short glimpse of this “face” before this creature’s hand grabbed me and put me on a shelf with a few other bags on it as well. Some of the bags had bears like me in them; others contained everything from worms to soda bottles to fruit. The creature walked up to the door and flipped the switch. Everything around me got much darker. When he walked outside and closed the door, everything went completely dark. I was having a long and tiring day, and I took the opportunity to finally get some rest.
I was woken up by the sound of a bell and a door being opened. A creature similar to the hairy one I saw before, but shorter, rushed towards me. He pointed at my bag.
“MOMMY, MOMMY, MOMMY! I want it! Give it to me!” it shrieked, jumping up and down with excitement. I noticed that the stomach portion of this human was rather fat and large, as if someone had taken an air pump and filled it up too much. I was surprised his belly didn’t pop. A blond-haired woman, looking rather stressed, shuffled towards the boy. She looked very worried and strained, with messy hair, dirty clothes, and bags under her eyes. Whatever her life was like, I could tell that it was very hard for her to handle.
“No, Duncan, you already know that sugar is bad for you,” she scolded him.
“But Mommy!!!” the chubby kid replied in protest, “I promise I won’t eat too much of it. I pretty pretty pretty promise!” It made its eyes as large as possible. I admit that it was easy to feel sad for the pathetic creature.
“Awww…” the woman said after  awhile, “I guess it is okay for for you to have a little bit, I suppose. What harm could it possibly do? It’s not like the gummy bears have feelings...”
That last part seriously offended me. I didn’t have too much time to think about this though, since the kid lunged at me the moment the woman finished her sentence. The entire bag was grabbed by his hands, shaking me and my distressed fellow gummy bears around. I felt his sweaty hands soak the bag and my surroundings.
They walked over to the man that looked like he had bushes of hair all over his face.
“That will be $1.49,” he replied with little interest in his voice. The lady gave him large sheets of green paper with a picture of some grandma with a huge wig on her head, along with several shiny metal circles.
Just moments after they left the building, the kid ripped open the top of the bag. He grabbed several other gummies, and they disappeared in the large and slimy hole in the middle of his face.
Uh-oh! I never knew that my purpose in life was to be eaten! I tried to escape without getting too close to his hand. Soon, all my other gummy friends had been eaten—except for me! It was over. It was as if the world was suddenly in slow motion. His hand came closer and closer towards me. This was the end. My entire life flashed before my eyes. First the factory, then the packaging, the long ride on the truck, and being brought into the store. I never knew it would end like this: with a chubby kid eating me and my friends alive without any mercy. It was fun being a gummy while it lasted. Goodbye, saturated-sugar filled world…
Just before he picked me up, I heard the lady scream at him.
“That’s enough,” she said in frustration. “You had the opposite of a ‘little bit’ of gummies! Duncan McGlocklin, young man, come over here and stop being such a junk-foodaholic! You are officially grounded.”
Large droplets of water began pouring from his eyes, dripping into the bag, and it was enough to almost drown me. He mumbled and whined some things I couldn’t understand. Then he dropped the entire bag onto the grassy ground.
Phew! I had gotten out of my situation—even though I very nearly died. The lady had saved my tiny, gelatinous life. Now, I stepped out of the bag onto a new frontier. One small step for gummy bear, giant amounts of unnecessary calories not being consumed!

This is where Ms. DiDonato decided to end the story, so what you see above was included in The Lion's Pride. However, the REAL story doesn't end there just yet. In my full version, it continues like this:

My success was short lived. I saw a large, smelly creature walking on all fours dash towards my dropped bag. It had a humongous nose, floppy ears, and a mouth that kept on drooling onto the ground wherever it went. It also had a tail that wagged even faster when it looked at me. This unpleasant creature came right in front of my bag. It sniffed me for a while. It tried to eat me, but it couldn’t fit its large head into the bag. Good thing that it wasn’t very smart, or else I would be dead, and dead way too soon, especially after I just escaped from one mouth.
Eventually, I guess it figured out the answer to its problem. With one bite of his pointy and rotten teeth, it tore apart the bag. Then it opened up its mouth and took me inside. -
My last thoughts before being chomped in half was whoever had trained this animal to behave, they didn’t do it very well. Whatever was left of me saw a large, black hole, that never ended…
                                    I was dead.
At least I thought I was. But turns out, I was alive─barely. Some parts of my gummy face remained, thankfully. All I could see was slimy stuff all around. It was disgusting! What in the world had this animal even decided to put in its mouth? I spent a long, miserable time of waiting in its stomach…  after which I finally saw light. What happened next was even worse. I won’t even bother to describe it to you.
I came out back onto the ground, along with more piles of assorted gross stuff. I sank into the soil along with it. After what seemed like a gazillitrillibillion years later, I felt the ground that I had become ingrained in being lifted up by a shovel. I saw a red-haired man holding the shovel dump me into a bucket. This bucket was brought into a room with several other buckets. I was melted and turned into a liquid. It happened to be neon red. I wondered what the man was going to make out of such disgusting ingredients. Surely enough, it couldn’t be edible. Then, he emptied the contents through a large plastic tube. That’s when everything went black…

My first ever real memory was of falling through a large plastic tube. Then I landed in a bucket full of neon-red liquid…


My teacher told me that the weekend after she read it, she actually did think twice before eating a bag of gummy bears. But I guess my story didn't stop her, since she said she ate it anyways.

*immense applause from the readers*
Thank you, thank you. I'll be here all week. Just give me a moment for a snack break.